Pregnancy
By Dave and Jaja

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A SetSailor writes:
I am pregnant and wondering about going cruising. I was hoping you would offer us some encouragement, practical advice, and any words of caution you have...Thanks in advance for your help, Michelle

Dear Michelle,

It's great to know that there are still adventurous people out there who are willing to take life in their own hands. Canceling your cruising plans because of your pregnancy could be more stressful than going ahead as planned. Besides, out on the ocean you will be breathing clean air, getting plenty of rest and eating well. Also, your partner has a better chance of being involved with the pregnancy if you are together more often.

I don't think you are naive in your thoughts regarding a pregnancy afloat. It seems as though you have researched through the Internet and by talking to midwives. When Dave and I were sailing across the Pacific I was smart enough to figure out that I was pregnant, but that was the limit of my knowledge on babies. I had no experience with infants, had never held a newborn, and had no friends who had babies. Dave thought babies lay on their backs and slept until they were two years old.

I educated myself the way I always do: through books. I was careful about my diet, took prenatal vitamins, and stopped drinking coffee and tea. I got plenty of fresh air and exercise on the boat.

Your biggest challenge, if you decide on a pregnancy afloat, will be to filter the "advice" of "well wishers". They will try to scare you under the guise of "trying to help". I don't think they do it on purpose, but that makes it even worse. As we traveled through the Pacific almost every woman I met had some advice for me. I learned about all the horrible ways I could suffer and die, and all the terrible things that could happen to me and my unborn baby. I heard every conceivable type of horror story involving mutilations, disfigurements, diseases, syndromes, disorders etc. I received very little encouragement and almost no practical advice. That was among cruisers.

The native women and girls living on the islands we visited, were naturally supportive. In their society every young woman becomes pregnant and has babies as a matter of course. They would have been surprised if I wasn't pregnant. After all, I had a man, didn't I? I even had native girls ask me (using sign language) "Are you pregnant?" If I had answered "No" they would have wanted to know: "Why not?"

Whenever I became worried about giving birth I would think of a particularly pathetic woman that I knew: "If she could have a baby, so could I," I would tell myself. As we traveled I became my own doctor, listening to my body, reading my books, and being extremely aware of nutrition.

My first prenatal visit was in Australia, when I was 8 and a half months pregnant. When Chris was born the doctor called it "a textbook birth". My second child was born on a friend's bedroom floor in New Zealand. The midwife almost didn't get there in time. She was jogging around Mt. Manganui and we couldn't reach her. Our third baby was born on the boat--do-it-yourself style.

The midwives you talked with brought up some good points. First, that you will have to look after yourself carefully. But also that since you are young, healthy, and active there's no reason why you should have complications. And if complications do arise while you are cruising, you can always stop and seek medical help. Every place that has women also has doctors who know about babies. It's not like brain surgery. (You will need that when your child turns 13--best to schedule now!)

Finally, you asked about nappies. I used cloth nappies for all my kids. We had two buckets that lived permanently on the stern deck. You know what they were filled with... Anyway, I hand washed nappies every day and hung them in the sun to dry. The strong island sun bleached them beautifully (so did the nappi-san). When we went on passage the buckets remained on the stern deck and I continued to wash but I tried to conserve water--I used the rinse water from one load for the soaking water in the next bucket. It's amazing how well you can wash with just a small amount of water. If I had a particularly revolting nappy, I usually wanted to chuck it over the side and never look at it again. But my practical nature would kick in and I usually ended up dragging it overboard for a while. The only problem with dragging nappies is that it takes a lot of fresh water to rinse out the salt. Salt water will cause severe diaper rash faster than anything.

Sometimes, I would just drag the revolting nappies until we got in, rather than waste water on them--even if it was a few days. Sometimes people would tell me that I should wash the nappies in salt water. This would save water, they told me, and Dave wouldn't have to haul so many jerry jugs each day! My standard answer to them was: "How would you like your underwear washed in salt water?"

Good luck with your cruising plans. I think you will do well and I can't see why you would possibly have any problems. Remember: you can always quit if things don't work out, but at least you've given it a try.

Sincerely, Jaja Martin