Cruising with Toddlers
By Dave and Jaja

	Dave and Jaja's son Chris joined Direction's crew in Australia in 1990.

SetSail received an email from a family about to go cruising with twin toddler boys. We forwarded their questions to all of our contributors who have raised kids on boats...

We began sailing with Chris when he was 2 months old. When he was 18 months old, his sister, Holly, was born. By this time, he had logged several thousand offshore miles. When very small, the kids basically lived in Jaja's arms, or snuggled up with her while breast-feeding. When they got older, and if conditions allowed, we tucked them behind the settee lee clothes and jammed pillows around them. I believe hammocks are a bad idea. They swing around and are usually placed up in the air, creating a falling hazard. During rough weather the kids slept with us because it was the most reliable way to keep them from flying across the cabin.

Holly was born a year later in New Zealand. Here, she keeps watch during a passage to Fiji, with a harness and protective netting in the lifelines.

Life jackets are handy in a dinghy, but while sailing you want your children attached to the boat with a tether. If they fall over board you can pull them in like a fish. On Direction we seldom used life jackets, mainly because kids' life jackets are bulky in front and this creates a tripping hazard as they cannot see their feet. Tethers, we felt, were the safer alternative. That said, tethers are like leashes. They get caught on everything and will be constantly in need of untangling. But that's OK, because children should not be allowed on deck unsupervised. Bicycle helmets are an OK idea, but I think toddlers need to experience the realities of bumps and pain to make the connection between cause and effect. By age two, kids in general are pretty savvy to their environment. With regards to worrying about them getting into the cockpit at night, we kept the lower hatch board locked in place. Escape was impossible.

Cruising with small kids can be a lot of work because there are no short cuts and no quick solutions. Jaja and I assimilated the increased hardships of child care afloat and it became "normal" for us. Of the couples we've met who've had a difficult time, or were unable to deal with it and quit, they spent too much energy harping on how much easier raising kids in a house would be. As soon as you head down that path you are doomed. My best advice (since all children and parenting techniques vary) is to go offshore and figure it out day by day. Don't over-analyze. Just go with an open mind. Believe me, if you are desperate to cruise you will figure out how to make it work and really enjoy it.

Congratulations for wanting to sail with two year old twins. There is no doubt in my mind that you will succeed.

- Dave